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A Big, Puffy-Faced Crier. Yeah, That’s Me.

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I literally cry all the time. And it’s not a cute, girly kind of cry where your face scrunches up like a puppy dog and tears fall in perfect lines down your cheeks. I’m more of a blubbering, puffy-eyed, nose-running kind of crier. The ugly kind. All the time.

And I don’t just cry when I’m sad either. Frustration? Tears. Anger? Sobbing. Happiness? Get ready for a bawl fest. But mostly, what really gets the waterworks going is when I’m overwhelmed. And with 5 AP classes, newspaper pages, bible studies, commissions, and college applications to juggle, my whole existence is composed of being overwhelmed. Hence the crying.

But it doesn’t really bother me, truthfully. I can handle some tears every other day or so. What sucks the most about being a walking, breathing, emotional time bomb is how other people react.

“What’s wrong?”

“Are you okay?”

“Aw what happened?”

With sides of pity and sympathy, the opposite of a Happy Meal. Ya, I am crying. Big freaking deal. Literally nothing is wrong, okay? I just saw that Amazon commercial with the baby and the dog dressed as a lion (Fun fact, I actually do cry every time I see that. Like I said: all the time.). Just leave me alone to cry in peace. Or better yet, just act like it never even happened. I swear I’m not one of those girls who’s just seeking attention and gets all butthurt when you don’t notice her emotional mood swings. I would really, honestly appreciate it if everyone were to just ignore my red, puffy, tear-stained face.

And another thing, why does everyone seem to think that crying is such a big, negative, end-of-the-world type deal? Half the time I laugh, there are tears rolling down my face. I cried when I won an award at VASE. Who decided that crying always had to be a bad thing, or that people only cry when they’re really upset or distressed? Crying, at least for me, is like the body’s way of restoring emotional balance and venting powerful emotions. My personal little rain storms can be caused by extreme joy just as easily as sadness. I’ve actually sobbed because I was watching “Dumbo,” one of my favorite movies from my childhood. The nostalgia was so thick and powerful that I broke down in tears. Watching a cartoon Casey Jr. chug-a-chug down the tracks. Literally.

So ya, I’m a crier. A big, ugly, puffy-eyed crier. And ya, I cry all the time. Who cares? That’s just who I am. I express emotion in a big way. I’m fine, you’re fine. Nobody gets hurt from my weekly cry fest. So just leave me to my tears and my tissues. I’ll be okay in like 15 minutes. But if my under-eyes are puffy and my cheeks are splotchy, you better just keep those inquiries to yourself. I got this. I just needed a good cry to get me on my way.

 

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pleasant grove high school newspaper, texarkana, tx
A Big, Puffy-Faced Crier. Yeah, That’s Me.